I have a shrunken shirt and I'm not afraid to wear it

I can't believe I put my favorite shirt into the dryer last night... not by mistake, but by free will!! Now, keep in mind that my 2 daughters would rather me have given it to Goodwill or some other charity because I'm often criticized for wearing this shirt too much.... but you can't beat a good shirt!!  So, bringing it back to why I put it in the dryer... it has become too large for me to wear because I've actually been working out for 2.5 months now!  Is this a huge step for me?  YES!

I never thought I'd be one to be on a "health kick", but I'm there and it really does feel great!  Eating has never been much of a problem for me -- I'd rather eat salty foods than sweets (although salt can be just as bad), I'm not much of a "flavor enhancer" (using salt, dressings, or dips on food), and I generally love vegetables (I could probably become a vegetarian if I wouldn't get killed by my other household members)... but in December (before the New Year's resolutions) I decided that I was sick of feeling horrible about myself. 

The feeling of horrible - yes, I was there for several years not wanting to go out (although I did), feeling uncomfortable when I was out, not wanting to go shopping for new clothes (which was probably good!), feeling self-conscious, and wishing I was 20 pounds lighter.  Not a good feeling at all.  So, I finally came to the resolution that the weight was not going to drop off of me.. and realized that the only person who could make the change about how I felt about myself was me. 

I purchased some workout gear over last Summer and never used it because I sprained my ankle on that same work trip in which I had bought the gear.. that was my excuse for a long time - the ankle... well, you can only milk that for so long and by December 2012 I decided to start running .. like Forrest Gump.  Only, not the distance he did and I have more updated shoes.  I started running with Charles (thank God he is such a great supporter) and ran a little over 2 miles around the outskirts of our neighborhood, every other day.  I started feeling comfortable with running (I used to not want to run for fear of how I looked when running), and began venturing on my own even when Charles wasn't available to run with me.  I got so comfortable, I would run in front of the long car line at my daughter's school, not even thinking twice about it. 

Running led to me being comfortable at a gym, so I began going to one and running on the treadmill (I found that my shins didn't hurt as bad) and I could actually run for 30 mins. straight at a speed of 4.5 without stopping!  That was a huge accomplishment for me.  During my build up of running, I began watching the new season of Biggest Loser (it's a family event every Monday night), and learning tricks and workout moves from there - I got even more comfortable.  I purchased a Jillian Michaels buns and thighs workout DVD and began doing that workout for 30 mins. on the days I didn't go to the gym (and on some days when I couldn't get to the gym). 

I've had bad days of feeling like "Why am I doing this, the 20 pounds isn't shedding quickly!!".. but I've had a lot of encouragement to keep me pushing through - and finally 10 pounds is gone.. I'm halfway there -- and I got to finally dry my shirt!!

I tell you this because if you are contemplating working out and are unsure of how to go about it.. just do it!!  Really, that's all it takes.  Your confidence will come - if it's you don't have the right outfit, pick up some yoga pants at Target (they make you feel skinny and they hide all the flaws) and get moving -- you can buy cuter outfits when you feel more comfortable.  I was always shy of how to use the machines at the gym or learning how to do a new exercise.. not anymore.  It took some time, but I'm there... still have a ways to go, but working out is now in my routine and it feels great! 

Lastly, it's not about how you look - but ABOUT HOW YOU FEEL... and today marked a day of me knowing I feel healthier as I was running Tayte's Science Fair Project into her school in the cold, rainy, 38 degree weather -- as I ran outside back to my car, I thought, "Wow!  I don't even feel winded!"... and that's when I realized these 2.5 months have finally paid off!!

Now, to go try on the shirt :).

Friendship

Friends show their love in times of trouble, not in happiness.
Euripides 

Today, I sat quietly in a chapel listening to a man pay his last respects to his best friend. I sat unusually still.  This gentlemen had me captivated from the moment he took to the podium.  The man shared stories, jokes, quips, and quotes of his beloved friend.  He was spoke on behalf of his best friend's family. He spoke from his heart. He made me laugh. He made everyone laugh when all they wanted to do was cry. As I sat there listening, I asked myself if I would ever have the strength to do the same for my best friends.  I cried just at the thought. 

I truly believe that we never truly know how strong we are until we are faced with doing something we thought we never could. Even the gentleman speaking didn't know if he would be able to get through his testament. As he continued, I kept asking myself if I could ever be as stoic as this man before me.  My question goes unanswered.  I'm not going to lie. I would like to think that I could do it.  I would like to think that I'm just that strong.  But I'll never really know until the time comes, will I?

Finally, I look over to my best friend of 30 years and asked her if she thought we would ever be able to do that for each other. Her response? "Well, you won't have to because you're going to die before me." HAAAAAAAAA! I fell out of my seat laughing.  Hence, this wonderful thing Sandy and I share that we call friendship. 

Making Time

You ever have one of those days when you need more hours in the day just to get everything in? Generally, that's everyday for me.

 Today, I'm running all over town (trying to squeeze 28 hours into 24) when I receive a call.  It's urgent. Her voice concerning. She needs to talk. She needs me!  Though I'm en route to a very important appointment, I pull my car over to see what is troubling my dear friend.  Nothing is more important than being there for a friend, right?  Forget filing taxes, it can wait. For get handling your personal affairs, someone important needs you!  Gas the car? What the hell for?! Dinner? NO, it can WAIT! Two minutes into the conversation I realize the huge dilemma is whether or not to host a slumber this weekend. Seriously? Wait, could you repeat that? Late for my appointments, late for dinner, needing to find a gas station, no time to shop but I was there for a friend in need. Someone owes me twenty minutes of my life back.

Oh, and I'm gonna sock Sandy in the nose when I see her. 

Venus vs. Mars ... Water for Elephants

 

********This is the first installment of the Venus vs. Mars series!! My good friend Sean Hill of http://hillstreetviewz.blogspot fame will be providing the “Mars” point of view of this film. Let the games begin!!**********

 

Venus Says:

 

The way I came about watching this movie was by chance... I don’t remember seeing the trailers for it which is strange because I’m such a huge movie buff.  My daughter and her friend happened to rent it one night because they said it was the only movie that appeared worth watching. Within the first 5 mins of the movie I was hooked….  I didn’t realize this movie had such a romantic flair, and Reese Witherspoon plays an awesome role of being the Ring Master’s wife who falls for the man who trains the elephants.  It’s not a movie about adultery, but rather a story about two people who fall in love that cannot be together.  The storyline is not just about romance and falling in love, but it’s also about being a family and relying upon one another when that is all you have.  If you haven’t seen it, you need to – it’s a sweet surprise of a movie that will make you want to watch it time and time again.  It’s become one of my all-time favorites – even to the point of me giving it to my Charles for our one year anniversary, writing on the back of the case, “This was a nice surprise for us – we fell in love with it together”…. proving also that men will enjoy this movie just as much :) Venus gives 4 stars!!

Mars Says:

 

It’s Valentines season and love is in the air. Stores are stocked with every kind of Valentines Day cards, florists have more stock than they know what to do with, and fancy restaurants are booked solid for the day. This is also the time some men will try to placate their significant others by sitting down and watching a romantic movie with their wives. If the wrong movie is selected it can be a grueling experience.

 

            Water for Elephants is a TERRIBLE title for a romantic film. It in no way screams romance but I know not to judge a book by its cover but that title would not make me want to pick up the book. The film starts out with one of my most hated plot devices which is the “let me tell you the story of my life and thereby I will eliminate all dramatic tension as to whether I will live or die because I am here telling the story so of course I live”. We then flashback to the past and meet the younger version of the story teller, in this instance it’s non other than Twilight’s Robert Pattinson, playing a young veterinarian student named Jacob (insert your own Twilight joke here). Jacob’s rich, well his parents are at least, until they are killed in auto accident and he finds out that his parents had blew their wealth on his tuition. So what’s a young homeless person to do? He decides to leave town with a few possessions and the clothes on his back. He decides to hop aboard a passing train and the train just HAPPENS to be a train for a traveling circus!! Now that is luck!

 

            He meets the star of the show, Marlena (Resse Witherspoon) and her husband August (Django Unchained’s Christoph Waltz) who is circus owner and head animal trainer. Of course Jacob is immediately smitten by her at first sight although it is unclear if the feeling is mutual. Well it just so happens that August is in need of vet and Jacob is hired. Later in the film August purchases an elephant (the elephant of the title I assume but there is only one elephant in the film so shouldn’t the title be Water for an Elephant?) August is having issues training the elephant until Jacob discovers that the elephant only responds to Polish which HE just so happens to speak!!! Somewhere during this time Jacob and Marlena fall in love. August finds out, complications arise, things happen, we go back to present day and find out what happens to Marlena and Jacob.

 

            This isn’t a very good film and it is not very focused. The movie seems more concerned with Jacobs’s relationship to the elephant than Marlena. The characters really have no chemistry and August is such an awful person that of course Marlena would be attracted to Jacob. However we don’t care about their coupling because we don’t get to know Marlena all that well.

 

So Mars says that guys will be incredibly bored by this film and I would hope that women would be bored as well. I didn’t find this movie to be very romantic at all. In fact I thought the elephant had more charm than Reese Witherspoon. The film is only worth seeing to partake in yet another suburb performance by Christoph Waltz. This guy is an incredible talent and gives this film more weight than it deserves. Bottom line on this one fellas, if your significant other suggest you snuggle up and watch this film I would suggest faking some sort of illness(it is flu season right now hint hint) and go to separate room and watch a Scorsese film. Sorry Venus, this one stinks!!! Mars gives it 2 stars!!

 

 

Hallmark Holiday

Love begins at home, and it is not how much we do... but how much love we put in that action. 
Mother Teresa 


Ahhhhhhhhh, the stress of being a man is upon us. How do I impress her? Do you send flowers? Do you buy jewelry? Maybe a fancy restaurant. Oh wait, let's send candy, that'll make her happy. Another Hallmark holiday is around the bend, are you ready?

 Ladies, it's just another day. You shouldn't put too much emphasis on your better half impressing those around you just on this one day. He should be impressing YOU each and every day; and you should be doing the same. I'm not saying send flowers 365 days a year, I'm saying it's the little things that matter.  The kiss on the forehead, the cup of coffee/breakfast brought to you in bed, the random phone call saying he misses you...oh and that one text saying, "I love you, gorgeous..."  How these things will give you butterflies...and no one can buy you internal butterflies.

So, don't be upset if the flowers in the next cubicle are prettier than yours. Don't be jealous over that diamond bracelet your friend received. Material things are easy. It's the thoughtfulness behind a sincere action that is hard to come by. All the money in the world won't get you that.

Having said that, please, send all chocolates my way. Happy Valentine's Day!

Ahhhh... suit and tie

I'm a romantic at heart... and this new song does it for me :).  It's Justin Timberlake's latest song, "Suit and Tie".  Maybe it's because I like gowns and gloves, tuxedos and bow ties, or glitz and glamour... Or maybe it's because I'm actually attending my first "ball" in a little over a week and this song came out at the perfect time :).  I'm a Michael Buble, Harry Connick, Jr., Robin Thicke, and Frank Sinatra fan so I can see why this new song caught my attention --- and I'm sure it will for the majority of you women (not to mention that Timberlake doesn't look half bad :)).. but, enjoy!  And it's always important to feel like a princess :). 

It's funny -- my dear friend, "HillStreetViewz" (http://hillstreetviewz.blogspot.com/), and I were discussing this song the other day and he has a "different take" on it than I do..  although our opinions are different, I still love him anyway :).  Who knows.. maybe he is smarter than me when it comes to critiquing.. or maybe it's because he's not as much into being a princess ....... :)

Decisions can be difficult .. but you still have to make them

My job of 13 years with the federal gov't ended yesterday... I did it by choice and at the height of what I was enjoying most.  I decided at this stage in life, it was more important to me to be with the ones I love, rather than having a career. 

Do I miss my job?... Very much so... I love to work and I love being financially independent.  It's different for me and I've had to deal with emotions that I didn't anticipate I'd be dealing with.  I wouldn't trade my 13 years of experience for anything -- the federal government was very good to me:  I learned so much about leadership, improving myself, teamwork, and responsibility.  I loved the people all over the U.S. that I worked with .. and I miss talking with them on a regular basis. 

I moved to OH 2 years ago for a promotion, taking my youngest child with me.  I took both of us away from it all.. family, friends, familiarity -- to have a better life.  I left my oldest child behind in GA, with her father, because she didn't want to leave her friends (which is understandable at the age of 13).  I thought at that time, the decision to move to OH was one of the toughest I had ever made....My youngest adapted well in OH, blossoming to the young "tween" she is today, and it was a good experience for both of us to live life in a new place, depending only on each other.  Did I miss my oldest?  Heck yeah, something awful.

Little did I know I'd meet the man of my dreams AFTER my move (he lived in my hometown), and it would bring me to moving to SC 2 years later where he found a company he really wanted to work for.  So, we made the decision to take up residence in Greenville.  This move places me MUCH closer to my oldest daughter, and my youngest much closer to her father in GA.  And, I'm finally a family now.

Is it easy for me?.. it hasn't been, but I have the ones I love, both family and friends, supporting this decision and that's all I need to move forward.  Decisions aren't easy.. sometimes you have to make them for others' happiness, and put yours on the back shelf.  Decisions create change.. but I'm a big fan of change and taking risks.  I think that is what has made me who I am today..and I'm proud of who I am (trust me, it's taken me years to come to that conclusion..)...

So, follow your dreams and don't be afraid to make decisions, even if something extremely difficult or something you know will cause a huge change in your life.  After all, every decision has a silver lining.. :)

Aging Gracefully

The beauty of a woman is not in a facial mode but the true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It is the caring that she lovingly gives the passion that she shows. The beauty of a woman grows with the passing years.
Audrey Hepburn 

Last night, I had dinner and drinks with an old friend. Well, we're not old, but we're not ..never mind, let me get back to what I was saying. As we sat there discussing relationships, feelings, and life in general a group of young ladies (21 at best) walked by. Barely dressed though it was thirty degrees out. Shirts unbuttoned down to there...Big hair, heavy make-up, little waists, heels higher than their IQs.... Of course, Megan and I laughed but then I had an epiphany. To be to where I am today, I was once where they are now. To have the confidence that I have today, I was once insecure. I am who I am for all the dumb mistakes I've made. The bad decisions that seemed to make all the sense in the world at the time. Hindsight is 20/20 indeed. 

So young ladies, wear those heels that you can barely walk in! (you looked ridiculous last night, btw) Show off your breasts while people still want to see them! (why are there buttons on a shirt anyway!) Paint on those jeans that are so tight a fart will bust the seam! (no one cares about your black thong)  Make your bad choices, make lots of them. Just take the lesson it teaches with you into your older years....